My [redacted] Journey

A teacher's search for inner peace.

To Change My Ways

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December 30, 2013
Dear Readers,
Traditionally, at the end of the calendar year, I have looked back and assessed what I have accomplished and what I could have done better. I would like to think that my accomplishments were much more than my “coulda done betters.” Most years they have been.
Because I do this self-assessment, of sorts, I rarely make any New Years’ resolutions. This year, I’d like to change that, so, here goes.
I resolve to stop stuffing my feelings. Those that know me are probably rolling their eyes about now and saying, “You never stuff your feelings around me! You always let me know how you feel!”. And in part, that is true. I do let others know how I feel, when I can ‘t stuff it any longer. I have become so used to not speaking up right away, that the way I feel is so exacerbated that I simply blow up. If I address what is bothering me in the first place, I wouldn’t blow up. Makes sense; I resolve to try it.
Next, I resolve to be less angry. I do not know why I allow outside influences to create anger in me, but I do. Things that I have no control over, send me into a fit. Perhaps it is because I have no control that flips me out. I don’t know. But, I do know it has to stop. For example, and this is just one of many I could cite, when I am in a hurry to get home from work and traffic slows to a crawl, I get heated. I take it personal, like everyone is conspiring to keep me from my destination. I know, crazy, right? I resolve to do better.
Finally, because I don’t want to overdo it, I resolve to show more love. I say the word love and I write the word love but, I do not think my actions match what I write and say. I want the people in my life to see my actions as love. I do think that actions speak louder than words. And that really sucks sometimes for the writer in me. I would like yo be able to just write instead of show. But, showing would make people close to me happier than my writing it. And in the end, making people that love me happy, will make me happy. It’s a win/win. So, I resolve to show more love.
Well, dear Readers, those are my resolutions. I hope that we are still together in one year so that I may tell you how I did. I am going into 2014 more positive than I have been in years. I believe that my accomplishments outweighed my negatives and I believe I am doing more good than not. I wish everyone a very happy and safe New Year. Peace, ~v.

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2 thoughts on “To Change My Ways

  1. Pingback: Shall We Resolve? | anonymous real thoughts

  2. Pingback: New Year Resolve | Westwind Wellness Center, LLCWestwind Wellness Center, LLC

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