May 7, 2015
In Phoenix, Arizona a few days ago, a substitute teacher was accused of assaulting a middle school student. You can read the complete story and view the video right here, on Fox 10 Phoenix. The Fox affiliate reports, “It happened in an 8th grade social studies class, a 13-year-old student and a substitute teacher were involved in a confrontation. The student said something to the teacher and appeared to push or bump him, that is when the teacher took him to the ground. Students recorded the incident on their cell phones.”
Whatever your opinion about the teacher, I will neither defend, nor persecute him; that is for people with much greater power than I to decide. No, I want to discuss the actions of the student and his mother after the incident, when the parent spoke to the reporter.
The mother states, on-camera, “I don’t care what words come out of a child’s mouth, no one should ever put their hands on a child like that.”
And while some of you may agree, the student. while declining to go on camera, readily admitted that “he called the teacher a racial slur before the take down.”
As I viewed the video, I kept waiting for the mother to show even a little bit of shame that her son had shown such hate as to call a grown man the ‘N’ word. Nope, nothing; not a trace of humiliation. In fact, the words she uses to acknowledge that her son said anything wrong were, “I don’t care what words come out of a child’s mouth…” Well, that’s just not good enough for me. It wasn’t ‘a child’, it was her child. I was waiting for any indication that she plans on holding her son responsible for his actions. Even if just to say, “My son shouldn’t have said that.”
Next, the mother states, “He’s 13, and 13-year-old kids don’t make good decisions sometimes…” Really? It seems to me that when your child doesn’t make good decisions, he should suffer the consequences of his actions. Otherwise, how will your son ever learn the difference between a good, versus a bad decision. If the parent considers her son’s decision to call a six foot five black man a racial slur, and then try and then chest bump him, a bad decision, what are his consequences? You see, if a thirteen year old makes a decision, and he suffers no consequences, he learns that he has just made a good decision.
Bad decisions equal consequences while good decisions equal no consequences. My thought, this kid is gonna feel entitled to challenge adults and call names…wait, he already does. So, tell me, Entitled Kid’s mother, had the teacher not put his hands on your child, what would you have done when the school called to tell you that your son was defiant, pushed up on his teacher, and called the teacher the ‘N’ word? Would you have said, “Son, your teacher is an adult, and adults don’t make good decisions sometimes, but what you said to your teacher is hateful. It’s hateful and wrong. Now I expect you to apologize at once. Apologize, because I’m not raising children who hate.”
Well, would you have said something like that if the teacher never laid a hand on your son. I would like to think, that given that scenario, you would, in fact admonish your child. Fair enough? Fair enough. Now, you should still admonish your son. What your son said was vile and hateful and can only bring destruction, not peace. Just because the teacher pushed back, it does not negate the fact that your son was wrong. Your son was wrong, wrong, wrong, and you should tell him. Then, and only then, will you be able to say that you have taught your children well. Peace, ~v.